ReImagined

     I did not do any of my school work this weekend.  I was busy doing nothing.  I did laundry and cleared out my kitchen.  Other than that, I sat and watched the weather.

     I had a moment and  texted a little with my son yesterday.  I told him to consider how he communicates...how SHE communicates.  He did consider it.  He asked me why I was bringing it up, and I told him it is because of his dad and I and our marriage.  It was not all doomed due to bad communication but it is a problem.  And not just my marriage or any marriages. Communication is a problem.
 
     I get upset when I say something and it is an all encompassing statement with no timeline and the person that I say it to applies it to a finite instance.  My ex was that kind of person.  I have other friends  that are that way...more than I realized until lately.  Today was one of those days.  I just did a head slap.  I did the eye brow raise/furrow, head slap, eye roll, groan.  Then I decided to just make note of those that limited my statement so that I would not do generalities with them.  It is all in how one thinks.  If I do not want to create more work for myself, I have to decide what I communicate and to whom.
 
     I know communication is the biggest piece of that marriage decision.  Honesty...and not just with each other. If they can't be honest with themselves (she with herself, him with himself) then how are they going to be honest with each other?   My son has TRIED to change his communication approach but she has already decided that everything he says is an attack.   I am not sure if they can come back from that.  My best advice to him was to think it all through and be honest about whether or not he REALLY feels that they can fix what is not working.  He is feeling overwhelmed. 

     He said that he is going to move in with her and her parents for a bit once this 3 week contract job is up.  He is going to work the next job and save money but if they do not seem like it is getting any better then he will take the money he has saved and get out...whether it is up here or his own place in that vicinity he will decide at that time. 

     I can understand that.  He is just trying to make sure it is not able to work at all.  No one wants to walk away if they have any doubts left.   I told him that he will know what he needs to do but I just ask that he really consider all of his options and possible scenarios and pick those that he feels he can live the best with.

     I know I ended that last sentence inappropriately but I am tired.  I spend all day on my work computer writing progress reports for my students. They are due to the parents this Friday.  I have one left to complete.  I have set a deadline to send them out for Wednesday.  Then I can use my Thursday afternoon and Friday to communicate with parents and dig into the pile of IEPs that I have to get written over the next 5 weeks.  I will be done with them by the time I have to help my son  pack and move.  It will be a tough work schedule because I have 9 IEPs to write and 6 of them are renewals that I have to include data from working with them for a semester.  There goes my weekends!