Tuesday, February 25, 2014

As Good As It Is Supposed to Be

My son has had to step aside from the wrestling lessons. He isn't cut out for it. His brain got in his way. They told him he kept over thinking everything. He isn't instinctual. He was kind of disappointed at first...but he at least gave it a try. Frankly, I'm just glad he got out without a broken bone! I was thinking about Troy...and how he is. He is obsessed with retirement...having enough money. I can get that but he is always uptight about something. I have come to realize that it is as good as it gets with him. I know he was on the run as a kid...pretty much took care of himself. Is always looking for acceptance; needs to prove to himself that he is worth something. I think his mother's lack of control has created control freaks out of her sons and her daughter has a self centeredness about her...dingy and selfish. I am not good at being married. Said it before...will always say it. I kinda like being able to do things/make decisions without having to get someone else's okay. I get upset if I figure someone else is keeping tabs on me. On the other hand, I know that I can be kinda careless so it is good to have a 'backup'. I just don't like how nuts he gets if he feels I am spending money on something I shouldn't. My daughter is doing hair experiments. I don't know HOW I let her talk me into bleaching the right 3rd of her hair. she parts her hair in the side so the bleaching followed the part. I don't like it. She thinks it makes her look cool. I'll be glad when she gets sick of it. My mother is doing somewhat better after her surgery. My MIL is making another comeback. They are no longer getting infection drainage and her kidneys are functioning again. My mother told me, with my father's 80th birthday they have decided this summer to look for a smaller house with a smaller yard. It is sad to see them put the family home up for sale...they have lived there 54 years. I grew up there...it is the only place I remember them living. However, I knew they would have to do it sometime. The packing up and moving will be THE WORST. And now...if I could just get a little energy back in me. I have none. Absolutely none. I can't even muster a deep down will to move.