Tuesday, March 3, 2015

0 to 60

So...wow.  I joined some meet up groups.  These are groups that you sign up with online according to your interests.  Yes, it is a group of strangers but they are people that share a common interest with you...and, like you, they want to have someone to go places and do things with according to this common interest. 

So I started with one called 'Friends First'.  Everyone is single for any reason...divorce, widowed, never married...and just wants a friend/friends to meet with for coffee/lunch/dinner and conversation.  Sometimes outings are planned for various things.  I met for morning coffee at a cute little coffee shop.  It was nice to get out of the house and have grownups to have conversation with on various subjects.  I get to  explore different places in the metro area.

I joined a gardening group hoping to get some tips and pointers on how to get rid of some of the nuisances in my gardens.  We get to tour gardens and find out which plants grow best in this nasty clay.  LOL  We had our first meetup this last Saturday.  Then, one of the guys that was at the meeting found me on a dating site and sent me a message asking me to meet him for coffee.  I politely explained that he was too young for me (8 years younger).  He seemed to be quite put out by that.  Another reason I didn't want to have coffee, or anything else with him, is that he looked somewhat like a homeless dude.  Seriously...

I also joined a Paint Nite group.  I don't know if they do this everywhere but what this is, an artist reserves a room at a restaurant that serves wine, and you pay to go and do a replica of a specific painting and drink wine.  My daughter went to a painting party (sans wine) and it looked like fun.  The paint party I chose is to do a picture that will go great with the new colors I have chosen for my kitchen.  (I need a painting party for my walls).

I have also signed up on 2 dating sites.  One is free and I 'met' one guy named Thomas on there.  He works on the Air Force base and is a database analyst.  He is a bigger guy, is a Christian, rides a Harley. 

The other date site charges a small monthly fee if you want to receive and answer messages.  I met 2 guys on that one.  Kirk, who is a RN, is a Christian, his looks and the sound of his voice/laugh remind me of Dax Shepherd.  He has two 'kids'...a boy and girl...30 and 33 respectively...and a granddaughter.  He lives with his 86 year old dad because his dad needs care.  We haven't met in person, yet, but we have texted a lot and have had one really long conversation. 

The other guy I met on that site is Michael.  He is a couple years older than I, is an administrator at a community college not too far from here, has 4 grown kids (3 boys, 1 girl) and he and I are having dinner this Friday night.  We have not spoken on the phone...only email through the site.  He seems a bit 'stiff' but nice.  I guess we'll see.

I am not getting nervous about whether or not I like them or they dislike me.  I am in no big hurry.  There are lots of ppl on this earth and a great many of them are guys.  I would like to fall in love someday...remarry...but not right away. 

I also signed up to start work on my Masters'.  I am getting my Masters' in Special Education and I start March 9.  I will be done June 2016.  Just in time to renew my teacher license. 

And I am in contact with a company that owns/runs charter schools in various areas of various states.  We'll see how that goes. 

I also, finally, looked at a picture of  Evil Spawn's Gangsta gf, Thug Life.  (thanks Karen)  That made it easier to move on.  wow.  He traded down.  She is 17 years younger than me but looks older than I.  Pudgy, tattooed up, deep furrows in her forehead and her hair...well, no thought goes into that mess.  So...when Karen, and others, told me he is with who he SHOULD have been with all along...I get it. 

Today I had a tooth extracted.  It broke.  Dr. Bob had to wrench it out and put a bone graft in so I can get a permanent implant put in later.  It is a molar but when I smile wide you could see the gap.  I have to wait 4 months for the bone graft to solidify and in the meantime, they are giving me a retainer with a fake tooth in it for me to wear.  My son's gf wears one of those and you really cannot tell!  The BEST PART of it all was the dental insurance dropped me on Feb.28 (Evil Spawn still had me on his dental insurance but open enrollment took place and since we are now divorced I had to be dropped) so the whole procedure, et al, had to be paid by me.  I put it on the joint credit card and it will be paid off in 3 payments...Unless I get a job soon then I will just pay it off earlier.  Unemployment only goes just so far. 

I keep calling him Evil Spawn.  He was a terrible husband in so many ways.  However, I am thankful that he stuck around to support his family monetarily until the kids were grown.  I am also grateful that he helped with med/dental/vision insurance as long as he was allowed and still carries it for the kids, I am grateful for the alimony and that he is working with me on the house issue, and grateful that he still allows me to use the credit card when I need to.  It is 'joint' only until he decides to remove me as an authorized user.

He is what he is.  He just doesn't get it.  Even though I have an idea what he is all about in the head, it does not change the fact that he is not anyone that I choose to be friends with.  I told him that from now on the only thing we are to each other is some other person in the family photos.  I was not trying to be mean...just emphasizing how well he doesn't know me after 25 years of marriage.  He worries that I am going to sell/ruin/break the collectibles and other belongings he left here until he can move them out in May.  I may THINK about it but I am not that person. 

So this week I filled up my calendar with things to do.  I went from being home all the time...to being social again! 

I am filling it up for July already too.  The kids and I bought tickets for a couple of concerts.  One concert is Boston!  Woohoo! The second concert is Fallout Boy.  I am really looking forward to them both.  I think it is pretty sweet that my kids like going to concerts with their 'old' mom.  LOL

No comments: