I made a promise to myself....I was going to use this year to go DO things. Of course, the COVID business put a damper on some of it but it also took some anxiety off of me. I don't have to think up excuses to NOT do things. However, it also made me appreciate time with friends and family.
I am doing a more sensible diet change and exercise habit. The sunshine always gives me more energy and happiness anyway. I am trying not to despair over the state of my yard. The weeds around my house are many, plentiful and HUGE. I will have to pull what I can, spray what I can and wait for them to die down. This Saturday looks like it will be good for that. Dawn wants to go to this green house to look for hanging baskets and I possibly can. I don't have the time she does to work outside. She's retired now. I am still working. BUT, I will make the time to go with her.
I was finishing up working with a student yesterday afternoon when Debbie called. She said she was down at the beach (5 minutes down the road) and did I want to take a break? well...YEAH! So, I shut things down, let Lucy out to do her thing then hopped in my car.
It was windy, the waves were fast and hitting the shore like a battering ram. But it was so nice to stand there in the sun and take it in. She and I had a talk about many and various things then we drove to Bridge St because she wanted to pick up dinner to take home. She asked me many times to take a piece of pizza but I wasn't in the mood. (I know, right?) She said, You have such good will power!
I told her I have good will power IF I am seeing results. I did not want to find the LBs I lost last week. ha ha!
Today, I went out and mowed the lawn. It looks HORRIBLE! Mounds of dead grass everywhere. I wanted mulching blades on my tractor. My dad won't put them on because he and my brother insist that they are going to find me a BETTER tractor. I told them there isn't anything wrong with the one I have but they insist. UGH!
I had to push mow more than I usually do because it was extra squishy next to the storage building and the tractor got stuck. I had to push it out. So I push mowed around the building. My calves will be letting me know tomorrow how much the disliked that whole deal. I am not sure why but they ALWAYS feel like they have knots in them. No matter what I do, they get knotted up and get sore more easily than any other part of my body. Perhaps they need more stretching than they get.
Anyhow, Susan sounded kind of depressed yesterday. This whole staying home thing is really getting to her. She likes to get out and do things and have people to talk to and she has only had her mom and has not gotten out much. She is a big stickler for the distancing and 'rules'. Debbie, on the other hand, is a nurse and just shrugs about it. The only thing she is careful about is not getting her hands on her face.
After I got done mowing the lawn, I took Lucy outside and I sat on the porch for a bit. She laid in the grass. When we have more good days, I will take time at the end of my day to take her for walks. She will be happier and I will too. We just keep having rain. We have more thunderstorms coming in for tonight and tomorrow. yay. I should bring my tulips in.
Tuesday, April 28, 2020
Sunday, April 26, 2020
Digging Not to China
I loaded Lucy up and went to visit with my parents and my 2 nearby siblings. It has become a regular Sunday afternoon thing. We would all show up after mom and dad got home from church. Church is now closed, of course, but we still show up between 12 and 12:30 anyway. I have discovered something...my parents are hard of hearing and become more easily confused the older they get but my brother just does not listen. I have to repeat myself to him 3 times because he only 'hears' parts at a time. He is too eager to give 'advice' so he doesn't listen to the whole thing.
I joined a local plant exchange group on FB. I was looking for some rhubarb plants and the one that started the group messaged me and told me that after seeing my post, she posted looking for rhubarb, too and someone responded to her that she could come dig up as much rhubarb as she wanted so she would dig some up for me too and all I had to do was come to her house and get it. So, I did and Saturday I was out digging up a new garden spot for plants that like the shade and moist soil (rhubarb being one of those plants). I dug up some of my extra hosta, yellow lillies and yellow irises and planted them there too. I even had some leftover rhubarb to give my sister. The garden spot was started by a large rubbermade deck box that I had removed from my porch (not good sitting on a wooden floor) and sat it up next to my garage. I asked my brother if he wanted it so my dad and I loaded it in the back of my SUV and my dad took it to him when he took my SUV home with him (dad was taking it to the mechanic early in the morning last Tuesday) to get my new front struts on...which I had also left in my brother's garage after he thought he was going to put them on for me but discovered he would be able to get to the left one. I told him I would have Dean (my brother's friend that owns a car repair garage) do it but I asked him to store the struts in his garage until I needed them because they were too heavy for me to move around.
AT ANY RATE, the grass under where the deck box had been sitting was dead so it was easy to dig it up. I also dug up more. I then took up the few large cement squares leading to my porch and laid them on the weeds and grass along the garage that I still want to get rid of to extend the garden. I then started cutting and lifting sod because I am laying a double line of square cement pavers to create a walkway to my porch from the driveway. I found a brick to measure the space between the pavers. I got 4 down...36 more to go. I did some weeding and cleaned out my storage building and I potted some more plants.
I took a dog dish full of water out for Lucy. She laid in the grass and watched the neighborhood OR followed me around the yard. It was a very nice and productive day for us both.
Friday I took my touch screen laptops to my cousin Tommy. Today, after I left mom and dad's, I went and picked up my newer touch screen. He had to reload my OS but it is now working just great! He said the charging port inside the other one is cracked and he will have to see if he can find another one for it. I told him not to sweat that one. However, I did drop off my dad's laptop with him. Dad said he decided to take the Chromebook back after all. He said he realized he didn't need to spend that money for something he really didn't need. But I could tell he was disappointed in his laptop. I talked him in to letting me take it to Tommy and letting him work on it. Tommy messaged me tonight and told me he had already cleared out a ton of junk that was on dad's computer and added some RAM so that it would load things a bit easier. He is still working on getting it going faster so that dad can use it again. Maybe dad will be happy with his computer again. He spent too much money on it for it to be a paper weight.
I got a bird bath. It was so cheap I couldn't pass it up. The problem is it is a heavy cement thing. I am going to paint it first then I have a clear coat/sealer for cement spray to put on it after that paint dries THEN I will put it out front. I have SO much to do this year. I have to paint and secure the railing on my front steps, replace a ceramic light in my sunroom with a fan/light, replace a vent fan in the main bathroom, and put in the new flooring in my bedroom. I also need to put a couple more coats of porch paint on my porch.
Debbie said that if she buys her mom's house it needs some fixing up. She said she may call on me for help with that. I told her I can paint, wire in new fixtures and outlets, even help with some drywall and replace a garbage disposal however, if it is major building or plumbing I am no help. LOL Oh...lawn mowing, she is on her own also.
Okay...24 more days of school. 2 IEPs to write this week. It is good for me that it is raining all week so I won't feel tempted to go outside and dig.
I joined a local plant exchange group on FB. I was looking for some rhubarb plants and the one that started the group messaged me and told me that after seeing my post, she posted looking for rhubarb, too and someone responded to her that she could come dig up as much rhubarb as she wanted so she would dig some up for me too and all I had to do was come to her house and get it. So, I did and Saturday I was out digging up a new garden spot for plants that like the shade and moist soil (rhubarb being one of those plants). I dug up some of my extra hosta, yellow lillies and yellow irises and planted them there too. I even had some leftover rhubarb to give my sister. The garden spot was started by a large rubbermade deck box that I had removed from my porch (not good sitting on a wooden floor) and sat it up next to my garage. I asked my brother if he wanted it so my dad and I loaded it in the back of my SUV and my dad took it to him when he took my SUV home with him (dad was taking it to the mechanic early in the morning last Tuesday) to get my new front struts on...which I had also left in my brother's garage after he thought he was going to put them on for me but discovered he would be able to get to the left one. I told him I would have Dean (my brother's friend that owns a car repair garage) do it but I asked him to store the struts in his garage until I needed them because they were too heavy for me to move around.
AT ANY RATE, the grass under where the deck box had been sitting was dead so it was easy to dig it up. I also dug up more. I then took up the few large cement squares leading to my porch and laid them on the weeds and grass along the garage that I still want to get rid of to extend the garden. I then started cutting and lifting sod because I am laying a double line of square cement pavers to create a walkway to my porch from the driveway. I found a brick to measure the space between the pavers. I got 4 down...36 more to go. I did some weeding and cleaned out my storage building and I potted some more plants.
I took a dog dish full of water out for Lucy. She laid in the grass and watched the neighborhood OR followed me around the yard. It was a very nice and productive day for us both.
Friday I took my touch screen laptops to my cousin Tommy. Today, after I left mom and dad's, I went and picked up my newer touch screen. He had to reload my OS but it is now working just great! He said the charging port inside the other one is cracked and he will have to see if he can find another one for it. I told him not to sweat that one. However, I did drop off my dad's laptop with him. Dad said he decided to take the Chromebook back after all. He said he realized he didn't need to spend that money for something he really didn't need. But I could tell he was disappointed in his laptop. I talked him in to letting me take it to Tommy and letting him work on it. Tommy messaged me tonight and told me he had already cleared out a ton of junk that was on dad's computer and added some RAM so that it would load things a bit easier. He is still working on getting it going faster so that dad can use it again. Maybe dad will be happy with his computer again. He spent too much money on it for it to be a paper weight.
I got a bird bath. It was so cheap I couldn't pass it up. The problem is it is a heavy cement thing. I am going to paint it first then I have a clear coat/sealer for cement spray to put on it after that paint dries THEN I will put it out front. I have SO much to do this year. I have to paint and secure the railing on my front steps, replace a ceramic light in my sunroom with a fan/light, replace a vent fan in the main bathroom, and put in the new flooring in my bedroom. I also need to put a couple more coats of porch paint on my porch.
Debbie said that if she buys her mom's house it needs some fixing up. She said she may call on me for help with that. I told her I can paint, wire in new fixtures and outlets, even help with some drywall and replace a garbage disposal however, if it is major building or plumbing I am no help. LOL Oh...lawn mowing, she is on her own also.
Okay...24 more days of school. 2 IEPs to write this week. It is good for me that it is raining all week so I won't feel tempted to go outside and dig.
Friday, April 24, 2020
Bath for Birds and Pile o' Weeds
I did not think this would be quite so difficult. I told myself, "life will not change so much. You work from home, you live by yourself." But it has. I cannot see my friends. They will text and call but it is not the same. No sitting at each other's houses having tea or beer and conversation. No going to a store or restaurant together.
TJ's job got cut right before he was to start. The hospital closed parts of it and laid off 50% of the IT department. They told him that they would bring him in once things opened back up. But who knows when that will be?
Susan, whose husband died 2 weeks after my divorce was official, has not sat still since. She got busy and completed the remodel of their house that was planned in order for her mom to move in. Then she packed up her mom and moved her in. She joined a book club and volunteered at the community food pantry, among other things. She kept on working her job at the school. But then this stay-at-home corona virus thing hit and the school buildings closed and since she was a paraprofessional she just had to stay home...not clubs and she couldn't volunteer because she was worried about bringing germs home to her mom. She has had nothing but time to think and it is all settling in...her life without her husband.
Debbie called me tonight. She had told me over the weekend that she had to go stay with her mom because she had fallen outside and hurt her hip. She said she was pretty resentful because her 4 siblings expected it of her because she is the single one. She says her mom smokes a lot and is lazy and the smoking bothers her breathing. She also is resentful because she works long hours as a nurse and now she has to come there and clean up. Tonight she told me that she is considering buying her mom's house and then she will have her own place, she will fix it up and when her mom is gone, the house is hers. She said her mom can pay her rent. Her siblings told her to do that. I told her that the fixing of things is that pain in the butt part.
That seems to be my siblings way of thinking of me. When one of our parents dies, since I am single, I will get to take care of the one that's left. I wouldn't mind but their attitude seems to be that I should just sit quietly and stay out of the way until they need me.
I tried to give my father my extra laptop. It has a really fast processor and I took all of my stuff off of it. He was complaining that his laptop was slow. BUT as soon as I mentioned giving him my extra laptop he ran out and bought a chromebook. I overreacted about it when it was none of my business. I apologized for questioning their need to buy that when I could have given them a free computer. I was being ornery. I had been anxious all do and found myself having intermittent panic attacks. I had seen someone post on FB "remember, there are some that are quarantined with abusers." and it just sent me over the edge. I really did not expect a reaction let alone panic attacks. All day. I ended up taking 2 CBD oil capsules so that I could calm down and sleep. I woke up this morning and I felt the anxiety rising in me again so I took 2 more capsules. I told Debbie that those reactions just need to be done already. She said, "you need more therapy. Yet, you bought a bird bath." I told her that working outside IS my therapy.
I went down the road to my cousin Tommy Jr.'s tonight to drop off my touchscreen laptop for him to fix. I will be SO happy to have that back. Well, since my dad does not want this laptop I am typing on right now, I will give it to TJ's wife, Brittany. Tommy Jr. is fixing the other smaller, slower touchscreen laptop that the ex bought me 6 years ago. I will have that for a back up incase something happens to my favorite touchscreen.
Any how, I have a lot of weeds to deal with outside tomorrow an a bird bath to deal with.
TJ's job got cut right before he was to start. The hospital closed parts of it and laid off 50% of the IT department. They told him that they would bring him in once things opened back up. But who knows when that will be?
Susan, whose husband died 2 weeks after my divorce was official, has not sat still since. She got busy and completed the remodel of their house that was planned in order for her mom to move in. Then she packed up her mom and moved her in. She joined a book club and volunteered at the community food pantry, among other things. She kept on working her job at the school. But then this stay-at-home corona virus thing hit and the school buildings closed and since she was a paraprofessional she just had to stay home...not clubs and she couldn't volunteer because she was worried about bringing germs home to her mom. She has had nothing but time to think and it is all settling in...her life without her husband.
Debbie called me tonight. She had told me over the weekend that she had to go stay with her mom because she had fallen outside and hurt her hip. She said she was pretty resentful because her 4 siblings expected it of her because she is the single one. She says her mom smokes a lot and is lazy and the smoking bothers her breathing. She also is resentful because she works long hours as a nurse and now she has to come there and clean up. Tonight she told me that she is considering buying her mom's house and then she will have her own place, she will fix it up and when her mom is gone, the house is hers. She said her mom can pay her rent. Her siblings told her to do that. I told her that the fixing of things is that pain in the butt part.
That seems to be my siblings way of thinking of me. When one of our parents dies, since I am single, I will get to take care of the one that's left. I wouldn't mind but their attitude seems to be that I should just sit quietly and stay out of the way until they need me.
I tried to give my father my extra laptop. It has a really fast processor and I took all of my stuff off of it. He was complaining that his laptop was slow. BUT as soon as I mentioned giving him my extra laptop he ran out and bought a chromebook. I overreacted about it when it was none of my business. I apologized for questioning their need to buy that when I could have given them a free computer. I was being ornery. I had been anxious all do and found myself having intermittent panic attacks. I had seen someone post on FB "remember, there are some that are quarantined with abusers." and it just sent me over the edge. I really did not expect a reaction let alone panic attacks. All day. I ended up taking 2 CBD oil capsules so that I could calm down and sleep. I woke up this morning and I felt the anxiety rising in me again so I took 2 more capsules. I told Debbie that those reactions just need to be done already. She said, "you need more therapy. Yet, you bought a bird bath." I told her that working outside IS my therapy.
I went down the road to my cousin Tommy Jr.'s tonight to drop off my touchscreen laptop for him to fix. I will be SO happy to have that back. Well, since my dad does not want this laptop I am typing on right now, I will give it to TJ's wife, Brittany. Tommy Jr. is fixing the other smaller, slower touchscreen laptop that the ex bought me 6 years ago. I will have that for a back up incase something happens to my favorite touchscreen.
Any how, I have a lot of weeds to deal with outside tomorrow an a bird bath to deal with.
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