DNA

For all the books I've read about human nature and why people act the way they do...I still do not understand. Well, I do...but I don't. I understand there are lots of mental differences and it is shaped by DNA and outside influences. I am finding that DNA makes even more of a difference than outside influences. Wish I knew then what I know now. It's kinda like you can do everything just right as far as what you eat and exercise but if cancer is in your DNA, guess what... I am a good person...I treat everyone the same...in the beginning. Until I find the true person. Then I make up my mind as to how much time and effort a 'relationship' will get...full time...sometime...casual...cut off. I think this relationship with my husband needs to be cut off. I blamed myself for too many years thinking I was just terrible at relationships. I thought it was true that I was a bad wife. But now that I have the time to sit and think about EVERYTHING I realize he is just so WRONG. Where he made his major mistake was...when I lost my job at the kindergarten (long story and I was SO glad to leave!) and he met me in the garage as I arrived home...and then gave me this long, loud lecture about how disappointed he was in me. I "didn't try" 3 months later he was fired from his job. Did I do that to him? I could have (and don't think I didn't give it a few seconds consideration)...but that is not who I am. I hugged him, told him it would be okay...I was here for him...we would get through it together. For a few months he was this nice, generous person...helpful at home and with volunteer work at church. Then he got another job and it was like 180. I quit. I resent him for it. I am not a quitter but I actually have come to realize how much I like me and I like me enough NOT to subject myself to him and THIS for the rest of my life.